Peanut Butter & Jelly

Women get far more initial messages than men when it comes to online dating and while I wasn’t drowning in introductions, I had my fair share of good and bad hellos that either made me laugh and say hello, laugh and delete, think the dude needed Jesus or just ignore. Then I got one from a guy using his sign as his screen name with photos of him and his family. He appeared to be a dork, but I thought he was cute and responded. At the time I was talking to a few other guys and thought he’d be just another date and nothing more, but there was something different about this guy – which is what they all say, right?

We talked back and forth a bit via the site and then switched to texting. After staying up late a few nights in a row discussing regular peanut butter vs. almond butter, we decided it was time to meet. He took the day off work to take me to lunch, and was late. Turns out he’d had to have the police at his apartment because his roommate and their couch guest were at it. Hmm, this should’ve been a sign to cancel – but hey, he was honest and he took me to one of my favorite places in the valley. That was a Wednesday and on Thursday he’d asked me to go to a party with him and his friends. I remember having a date already for that night, but after a minute or so weighing one guy against another – I went with Mr. Late on the First Date. After one weekend together we decided we didn’t want to see anyone else and have been together ever since.
We’ve been together almost two years now and like the classic peanut butter and jelly combo, I believe we go pretty well together. Of course that’s not to say we haven’t had our bad days. Like when he plays video games when I’d rather him hang out with me, or when I nag him about something (and I know I am purposely being a bit of a bitch but continue to do so because sometimes I cannot stop). We’ll argue for a bit but in those almost two years, I think we’ve gone to bed only once mad at one another because we always find a way to talk it out. Which is huge for me because I loathe talking on that level. Keep me above the surface, but please don’t drag me to the Upside-Down, where mine is filled with emotions instead of the monsters who killed Barb without hesitation. Matt makes me get into that part of myself that I rarely let out and while I fight it sometimes through hesitated shakes of the head, he always gets me to talk about whatever issue we’re having.

That makes him the best teammate for me. As he brings something to the relationship that I never could. He cooks, I clean – and that’s how it shall remain. Unless of course I am tired. It’s been almost two years and we’ve gone past that honeymoon phase and I am happy with that because I love being 100% comfortable with him. Which isn’t easy because I am not truly comfortable with anyone. Seriously. I always have some sort of reservation, a guard up but with him? All shields are down and I’m as me as I ever could be.

We have this saying we came up with in the beginning; good days, bad days as long as they’re days with you. Which is something that reminds us that it’s not always going to be perfect because let’s face it, nothing is so all we can do is take it day by day and learn from each of them as the years pass us by. Plus, I couldn’t imagine the coming years without my new best friend in which I get to share a bed with every night.


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